Your actions might find “evidence” to justify your jealousy, even if your partner is totally faithful. When you’re feeling insecure, you might see a photograph of your partner with a friend and find yourself wondering if they’re having an affair. Or, you might feel like you’re not attractive or wealthy enough, so you scroll through your partner’s Instagram likes to “investigate” whether they’re more attracted to other people. Jealousy is a natural, common emotion but when left unchecked, jealousy can damage relationships. Although social media can worsen certain relationship problems in some cases, it can also be beneficial when used wisely.
How Social Media Affects Romantic Relationships
We’ve built a digital stage where the most intimate details of our relationships are performed for an audience, yet we keep forgetting to ask our partners if they even want to be in the show. 41% of young adults (18-30) in a 2023 CBS News poll say their partner’s “social media activity” (e.g., tagging them without consent, sharing intimate photos) violates their “privacy,” leading to “relationship strain. 28% of teens in a 2021 Common Sense Media study say they “feel their boundaries are violated” if their parents “post about their relationship” (e.g., academic struggles, dating) without “asking first,” leading to “embarrassment. A 2023 YouGov poll found that 38% of millennials have “had arguments” with their partner about “boundaries” on social media (e.g., “why you didn’t post about our anniversary”). 31% of parents in a 2019 study by the University of Texas report that their children’s social media use has “lessened” their ability to “have uninterrupted conversations” with their spouses. 41% of teens have seen their parents argue on social media or post about family conflicts, violating their privacy (2020, Pediatrics).
- Overall, social media plays a complex role in shaping interpersonal relationships, with both beneficial and detrimental consequences.
- Once a person becomes addicted to social media, they spend less time with their partner and enjoy less in the offline world.
- It shapes how individuals view love and what they expect from their partners.
Negative Comparisons
Some 18% of partnered adults ages 18 to 49 say they are often bothered by the amount of time their partner spends on their phone, compared with 6% of those ages 50 and older. Younger adults in romantic relationships also are more likely than their older counterparts to say they are often bothered by the amount of time their partner spends on social media (11% vs. 4%) crunchbase.com/organization/wingtalks and playing video games (7% vs. 3%). A survey by the nonprofit child advocacy group Common Sense Media reported that 52 percent of teenagers aged thirteen to seventeen said social media impacted their relationships positively.
44% of young adults (18-30) in a 2023 CBS News poll say their partner’s “social media presence” makes them “feel emotionally disconnected” during dates, as conversations are often “interrupted by scrolling. 36% of unmarried partners in a 2022 Guardian survey say social media has “made it harder” to “share personal struggles” with each other, leading to “less emotional closeness. 28% of teens in a 2021 Common Sense Media study say their parents’ social media use makes them feel “less emotionally supported” as a family, with 21% stating it leads to “less sharing of personal feelings. 29% of Gen Z adults in a 2020 Pew Research survey say their romantic relationship “feels less meaningful” because social media “replaces” in-person emotional bonding with “shallow likes and comments.
According to Pew Research Center, 75% of partnered adults share their cellphone passwords, and 62% share email passwords. This baseline of digital transparency suggests that most couples have found a workable framework for trust around devices. This is where the concept of “highlight reel vs. real life” becomes more than a platitude. Reconnecting with your actual partner — the imperfect, unfiltered version — requires deliberately stepping outside the comparison trap that social media creates.
Sharing experiences and seeking advice from trusted loved ones can reinforce positive behaviors and help couples feel less isolated in their struggles. To combat the pressure of perfection, couples can benefit from setting boundaries around social media use. Discussing and agreeing on what is acceptable to share online can help mitigate feelings of inadequacy. Engaging in activities that strengthen the relationship offline—such as date nights or shared hobbies—can also provide a counterbalance to the idealized portrayals seen online. Research by Drouin et al. (2015) found that jealousy related to social media interactions can be just as potent as jealousy stemming from face-to-face interactions.